Island Boy

Good job?

2011-04-17T21:31:00.001-07:00

I admit it, when I first heard that it wasn't good to say, "Good job!", I didn't get it. I didn't get it at all. What could possibly be bad about saying, "Good job!", I wondered?? Now I cringe when I hear the phrase, particularly when it's directed at my little ones.

Imagine if every time you did something ordinary the people around you said, "Good job!". You wouldn't believe it and kids don't either. As it turns out, kids are pretty smart.

Scribbled something on a piece of paper! Good job!!
Ate a bean? Good job!!
Got dressed? Good job!!

When you think about it, this stuff is pretty silly. Are there times when, "Good job!", might be appropriate? Sure, but it's far better to praise the process, not the result.

Disneyland!!

2011-02-08T04:15:00.001-08:00

I've been a little skeptical about Disneyland. I had heard that the lines are long and I had the general feeling that once you've been there might be some pressure to return (among other things). Still, it's a difficult place to resist over time when living in Southern California with young children, particularly when one has scored some free tickets.

So, in celebration of Island Boy's birthday, we finally did it...we went to Disneyland!!

He loved it! And, to be honest, we loved it, too. From Buzz Lightyear's Astro Blasters to the Monorail, Island Boy loved it all. He even loved his first roller coaster, such as it was. (The big question there was "why is it such a short ride??". Great question, son.)

The lines were perfectly manageable but that wasn't really the issue. Our little Island Boy did SO well. He was clearly fading near the end of our visit and, as hard as it is for most adults to recognize when they've reached their limits, Island Boy seemed to recognize that he was reaching his and we left the park just as smoothly as we arrived. All in all, a really lovely visit and a wonderful way to celebrate Island Boy's birthday.

Happy Birthday, Island Boy!!

Santa Claus Comes to Town!

2010-12-08T21:09:00.000-08:00

This evening Santa Claus made a visit to our neighborhood in his sleigh. I think Mommy was just as excited about it as Island Boy. We weren't really sure what to expect since we haven't had much snow around here this year (not that that is unusual, of course, but having grown up in the Midwest, I'm just not that familiar with how Santa travels when there's no snow).

Would Santa arrive via helicopter? Firetruck? Motorcycle? On foot? Reindeer? We had no idea! I have to tell you I was surprised as anyone to see Santa arriving on an ACTUAL SLEIGH!! He was accompanied by police escorts (and he was 30 minutes late pushing us way too close to bedtime for comfort), but he was so worth it.

This was no fake Santa. No, he was the REAL Santa. Jolly laugh and all. When he asked Island Boy what he wanted for Christmas, Island Boy raised the candy cane he had just been given and said, "I have this!".

Oh, yeah! If only a mere candy cane were all it took to make our little American children happy all of the time.

Big Boy Bike

2010-11-25T22:16:00.000-08:00

Today Island Boy got on his brand new big boy bike and rode!
And rode.
And rode.
And rode!

You would never know it was his first time on a bike with pedals (and no training wheels - we skipped those).
He started out with a balance bike, and voila! He's solid. And fast.
If you're thinking you might walk next to him while he rides his bike, adults, think again. Expect to break into a full run and work up a good sweat. Consider yourself forewarned.

Fortunately, on Thanksgiving Day we were all thankful for the unexpected exercise in addition to so many other things.

Kids are People

2010-10-11T20:54:00.000-07:00

There has been a lot of noise in the press recently about children and dining out. Come to think of it, there's been a lot of noise lately about children making noise everywhere - on planes, in restaurants and in general.

This post isn't about any of that. This post is about a different disturbing trend I've noticed recently when dining out: the inability of restaurant staff to recognize children as people. To be fair, this probably isn't really a "trend" - it's probably simply that I never noticed it (or experienced it) before I had children.

What's the issue? It goes something like this...we're seated at a restaurant and a very efficient waitress whisks away one of the place settings.

What the?!?

Excuse me, could we have one additional place setting - as in on for each of the people at our table, please?

At times, this request is met with a puzzled look. At other times, the request has been met with, "are you sure?" and the "helpful" wait person glances at the baby with a concerned look. Yes, I'm very sure that I don't want my baby to eat off the table and I don't want her to eat with her hands (unless she chooses to), so please bring her a place setting.

Yes, a complete place setting. Thank you!

A similar situation happens when we request water for everyone at the table and we receive either 2 or 3 water glasses for our family of 4. Yes, we'd like water for all of the people at the table. Yes, the baby is a person.

Yesterday, we had perhaps the worst of this category of experience ever. After our waitress took away one of our place settings and gave us 2 water glasses, she said, "Oh, your baby is so adorable! How old is she??". Island Boy, who is also incredibly adorable, spoke up and said, "I'm 3 and a half!". She glanced at him, did not respond, and continued to comment on and attempt to interact with the baby. Island Boy continued to vie for her attention, to no avail. I told him he was adorable, too and asked for the check.

If you do not have the courtesy, energy or common decency to provide an older sibling with at least as much attention (if not more) than you want to give to a baby, please don't say anything. Older siblings are people(!) and they are completely aware of what is happening. That means they might actually enjoy engaging in conversation and they might actually feel confused and hurt if you don't respond to them.

I am happy to report that we've also had some incredible experiences at restaurants with our little ones. It is such a pleasure to dine at a place where the staff "gets it". We come in early. The children are treated with respect. We're served quickly. We love it. And we return.

Green Expectations

2010-09-23T21:16:00.000-07:00

Island Boy graduated to green belt earlier this week and today he was "big man on campus" (or rather "big man on the mat") as the highest rank belt on the floor during Martial Arts class. It was interesting to watch the change in him.

He certainly isn't the oldest child in the class, nor is he the largest - not by a very long shot. Still, he stepped up to the challenge. It's not always easy for him to pay attention during an entire class (he IS three, after all), but today he confidently demonstrated skills and behaved like a green belt: focused, respectful and courteous.

I was beyond proud of him.

Back to School

2010-09-15T10:58:00.000-07:00

Island Boy went back to school today after a summer that was full of good things but still managed to be fleeting.

We rode on trains and planes and rental cars and shuttle buses, trolley cars and merry-go-rounds and boats and scooters, bikes and trikes and swings and slides, noodle boats and noodles and shoulders and orcas. We threw rocks in lakes and oceans and streams. We hiked mountains and forests and urban sidewalks. We fed goats and cows and antelope and yaks and even seagulls. We ate ice cream and more ice cream and more ice cream and cones. We ate tomatoes and beans and berries (blackberries, blueberries, strawberries, raspberries) and grapes fresh from the vines and sweet corn from the cob so many times. We made pies and ice cream again and again and shared them with friends who loved to dig in.

We visited family. We visited friends. We visited state fairs and aquariums.

We scribbled, we read, we sang and we laughed. We played in the sand and the rocks and the dirt. We jumped into foam pits and bounced on trampolines, slithered through tunnels and soared high on swings. We watched otters and sea lions and seals and octopus and jellies and sharks. We waved at the scuba divers waving at us.

The list of things we still want to do grows longer and longer, but we're back at school now so some things will simply wait.

Of all of the things we did with our days, perhaps I'm most proud of the most lazy days. All summer long we had such a ball and still we made time for nothing at all.

Prom

2010-08-24T21:33:00.000-07:00

"Dad, can you help me find my airplane?", Island Boy asked.

The question seemed innocent enough, but something wasn't right. He's not yet four, right? And he's already calling his daddy, "Dad"?? When did that happen??

It wasn't exactly overnight, but it seems like it. I'm not sure when that particular transition is supposed to happen, but doesn't it seem like that is a little bit more grown-up thing to be calling Daddy? Shouldn't we get just a few more years of "Daddy" and "Mommy"??

I do understand, at least intellectually (even if I'm not yet ready to accept this sort of thing emotionally), that this is only the beginning and that prom is right around the corner - car keys and all.

Brace yourself, Dad! We're in for a wild ride.

Cuddle up!

2010-07-27T10:20:00.000-07:00

Here's proof that it pays to dote! Children that are doted upon may grow up to be happier adults according to this article.

Sure, it's not proof positive and there are lots of other factors that shape us, but now you have one more good excuse to cuddle your kids.

Independence Day

2010-07-04T10:06:00.000-07:00

Island Boy has been interested in reading for a long time. I am still convinced he had never seen a book before we met him and that concerned me for a while. At this point; however, any concerns about that are long gone.

He's been reading along with us for quite a while now - often saying the words with us or finishing a sentence for us. Last night he insisted on reading to us and he read entire books to us.

Yes, books! Plural. Start to finish. He knows the words.

No, he didn't *really* read them, but he's getting there and it is delightful.

Media Access

2010-06-23T11:46:00.000-07:00

I've been vigilant in my quest to limit my children's access to media. As far as I know, Island Boy didn't watch any television before the age of two (in accordance with the American Academy of Pediatrics recommendations).

Since turning two, his television viewing has been largely restricted to what may be on when we visit a friend or relative's home with a few exceptions. Most of these rare exceptions have been made by Island Boy's Daddy and all for good reason. For example, "It's the World Cup!", might be something you would hear in our house in recent days.

As for me, the only time I can think of that I've voluntarily allowed my children to sit in front of the television is to watch...drumroll please!!...our wedding video. It's true. Instead of the grand plans we had for celebrating our anniversary, we spent the day at home with a sick little boy. And what's a mother to do with a sick little boy on her anniversary? I even let our daughter have a peek when she wasn't busy doing her thing.

Who knew just how entertaining a wedding video could be to a little boy?? He wanted to watch it over and over again. This is one time when I folded completely. It is difficult to say who enjoyed it more.

Yellow Belt

2010-06-15T22:16:00.000-07:00

Island Boy earned his yellow belt today. I will be the first to admit that it was touch and go for a while - in fact really for much of the time. Would he earn it?

We knew he could do it, but would he?? Island Boy has been impressive at his kicks, punches and blocks - when he actually does his kicks, punches and blocks. So often there are better things to try or to think about (e.g. hmm...I feel like doing half moon pose! or hey, I think I'll do a forward roll! or the ever popular, "I'm thirsty!").

It's not an easy thing for a young gentleman of any single-digit age to remain focused for any length of time and since that is the primary requirement for earning belts at this stage, it was a challenge. A big challenge.

Still, somehow Island Boy pulled through and earned his yellow belt and we're very, very proud of him.

Chemically Enhanced

2010-06-03T07:22:00.000-07:00

This article is pretty frightening. Chemicals on floors and other eating surfaces are not a good thing to have in your home if you have young children. No surprise there really, but for some reason we need to be reminded to get the chemicals off of our eating surfaces (yes, like it or not floors are eating surfaces when you have youngin's!) and out of our children's hands.

The article contains a number of easy hints about how to do clean up your act. Fortunately, it's really not all that hard (or expensive) to clean your home with natural ingredients and give your children non-toxic things to play with.

Crack Spider

2010-04-02T10:21:00.001-07:00

Island Boy discovered a spider setting up shop in between our patio door and the track it slides on. Island Boy examined the spider at close range. The spider, naturally, retreated into the crack.

"Where is it?", Island Boy inquired. I explained that the spider was hiding in the crack.

He wanted to know more about what kind of spider it was and why it was making a web. We explained. That was yesterday. Today, the web had grown and I decided I'd had enough of the spider. We called in Daddy, aka Spider Removal Expert.

Daddy escorted the spider safely outside. Once outside, Island Boy gave us a detailed commentary about the incident.

"Daddy said it was a house spider and put it outside. The Crack Spider made a web and Mommy didn't like it. The Crack Spider is outside now." That pretty much sums it up!

Orange Belt

2010-02-24T21:36:00.000-08:00

Island Boy graduated to his first real belt in Martial Arts class today. (Don't ask me how many belts they are - I have no idea!)

He's been taking classes since October when a new studio and a new instructor moved into our neighborhood. Perhaps eager to grow their fledgling business, the studio gamely agreed to accept students that were not-quite-three. There are days - and I'm only guessing here - when those instructors must ask themselves whether or not that was absolutely positively really really necessary.

It's true that Island Boy, like most now-barely-three-year-olds, can have a short attention span. Fortunately he is the youngest in the class and it is also true that he somehow manages to soak up some very impressive moves and snap to attention just when you fear that all hope is lost.

As the parents gathered for this class's first ever Belt Graduation Test and Ceremony, the children must have felt the excitement in the air. Although the parents routinely watch from the sidelines during class, on this day there was an extra current of energy running through the building and the children knew it. They reacted as expected - some wore their game faces and others pulled out nervous behaviors we had not seen before this day, but they all performed and, in the end, they all graduated.

Although at this age these children are still learning what it means to be "proud", every one of them was as proud as I've ever seen anyone as the rank of "Junior Orange Belt" was bestowed upon each of them.

Happy Birthday, Island Boy!

2010-02-06T21:51:00.000-08:00

We celebrated Island Boy's birthday with the biggest cake you've ever seen. We didn't really intend for it to be that big - we asked the folks at the cake place how many the cake would serve when we ordered it and their estimate sounded right on target.

It started out when we asked Island Boy what he wanted on his cake.
"Sprinkles!", he responded.
We breathed a sigh of relief. Why? Because, selfishly, it meant that I could order a cake from a place that makes fantastic cakes, but not so much with the children's designs on them. And, naturally we asked about the number of people our cake would serve.

It turns out their estimate was WAY off. Perhaps it would have been on target had the cake been a single layer. Perhaps it wouldn't have been far off had it been a double layer or perhaps it wouldn't have been far off if everyone at the party ate as much cake as I like to eat.

However, THIS cake turned out to be a TRIPLE layer, ginormous (and very delicious) masterpiece. Did we have leftovers? Yes, yes we did. Even after giving some to just about anyone that walked by we had leftovers upon leftovers - so much so that we found ourselves distributing more around the neighborhood that evening. Too much cake? Not such a bad problem to have, really.

The bottom line is that the celebration was wonderful. Nearly all of Island Boy's classmates joined us for a party that was fun and even educational. All in all it was a very, very special day.

We love you, son. Happy Birthday!!!

Cabbages

2010-01-31T21:29:00.000-08:00

Island Boy woke up bright and early and we asked him what he wanted for breakfast.

"Cabbages!"

Yes, our boy wants brussels sprouts for breakfast. That's my boy!

The Purpose of Statues

2010-01-02T08:01:00.000-08:00

We were reading to Island Boy today and he asked what statues were for. It was such a good question we asked him to speculate and naturally his answer was much more brilliant than anything most adults would come up with. The purpose of statues?

To make the buildings dance.

I love it!

Holiday Happiness

2009-12-20T03:09:00.000-08:00

The Holiday Sing was wonderful. Honestly. It was magical. Island Boy and his fellow performers produced some of the most beautiful music I've ever heard.

It was so much fun to be there in the crowd and see the little faces light up as each child scanned the crowd and located their families. It must have been pretty overwhelming for them as they lined up on the risers and faced so many adults with their many big cameras. Once he located us in the crowd, Island Boy sent us a huge smile, then buckled down and took his task so very seriously that he barely cracked a smile while performing his songs. He performed flawlessly (as far as we know) and sang each song complete with adorable choreographed gestures.

It was a wonderful holiday treat!

Island Boy Takes the Stage!

2009-12-14T22:52:00.000-08:00

On Thursday, Island Boy will take the stage for the first time - officially, that is. (As readers of this story know, Island Boy loves to take the stage informally at nearly every opportunity.)

He's been practicing for weeks - entertaining us with surprisingly harmonious holiday melodies complete with adorable choreography. I am positively bursting with pride. It's wonderful to see him practicing for his performance and enjoying his ability to master the lyrics, the melodies and the choreography. I cannot wait to see it all pulled together!

Music Hath Charms

2009-12-14T22:39:00.000-08:00

Last night we were transported...if only for a few magical moments...

We attended one of the most chaotic and fun Christmas parties ever. There were children. LOTS of children. And they were everywhere. But the party was well-organized with supervised craft projects to keep the little ones focused as well as backyard trees to keep the less-focused little ones occupied.

The highlight of the evening were the Christmas carols sung by professional carolers in traditional costume. The guests were positively captivated. As if that weren't enough, a professional singer among the guests graced us with her rendition of, "White Christmas". While she sang, not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse.

Everyone enjoyed the evening. It was lovely.

'Tis the Season!

2009-12-06T21:55:00.000-08:00

Well, it's been almost a month since the burglary and it's time to be MERRY. Island Boy still says, "Someone broke my house". We're all still processing and dealing with the monumental task of filing an insurance claim that represents such a paltry token of compensation for what was lost, but we're getting there.

Island Boy helped us pick out a Christmas tree and it's finally starting to feel like the holidays. It was fun to hear Island Boy's joy when he got home from school and said, "My Christmas tree is still here!" and we got a laugh when he let us know exactly how he felt about the slightly larger television that replaced our stolen one. "I want the smaller one, Daddy! I want my TV, Daddy." Yes, we do, too.

What Happened, Mommy?

2009-11-11T22:34:00.000-08:00

Our home was burglarized last weekend. It was traumatic, to say the least. Island Boy is dealing with it better than I am, as usual.

It was terrifying to come home and realize that someone had been in - and was possibly *still* in our home and it was heart wrenching to walk through and assess the damage. A number of the items can be easily replaced, but much of what was taken can simply not be replaced including our sense of security and so many little items I'd collected over a lifetime from the first pair of earrings I ever bought to so many other memories that are now simply that.

Island Boy sang the "goodbye song" before we left for school on Monday morning and after mentioning the names of several of his classmates he sang, "Goodbye, tv. Goodbye, Daddy's computer. Goodbye, Mommy's jewelry." It broke my heart, but apparently, this is the way children work through things like this. If only it were so easy for me.

Two Years Goes Fast

2009-11-05T21:25:00.000-08:00

We met our son two years ago today and I can say only that it's difficult to remember a time when he wasn't in our lives. He's an amazing person, full of curiosity and kindness with a healthy dose of mischievousness and a fine sense of humor. Best of all, he's happy and so are we.

Goodbye, Gourmet

2009-10-20T21:53:00.000-07:00

Ok, maybe I'm just a basket case because I have a newborn at home and a toddler transitioning to preschool, but it's not just me, is it?? Did anyone else cry when they opened their mailbox and saw the November (aka Final) issue of Gourmet Magazine?

Yes, it was a magazine about food and there are certainly plenty of magazines about food, but there was something very special about Gourmet. It was so well done (no pun intended, really).

Beyond that, it is another of those American institutions that you just expect to be there for you year after year or perhaps it's like that little Mom and Pop shop on the corner in your hometown that you thought would always be there. But now it's gone. It's not just about this particular magazine. The world has lost a lot in the past few years.

As Island Boy would say, "I'm sad".

Scientific Method at Work

2009-10-19T15:02:00.001-07:00

A friend picked Island Boy's Daddy up for a meeting yesterday.

"Windshield wipers!", Island Boy observed as he checked out said friend's car.
"Mommy's car has the same! And Daddy's car has the same!"

He didn't stop there...he noticed the rear wiper on Mommy's car and said,
"One more windshield wiper!"

Noticing that Daddy's car had no such rear wiper, he formed the hypothesis that some cars have windshield wipers on the back and some do not. He then walked around to the back of Daddy's friend's car to check his hypothesis.

Check! Hypothesis confirmed. He seemed satisfied with his work.

Don't you love to watch little minds at work?

Uh Oh, Truck!

2009-10-12T21:50:00.000-07:00

Driving down the freeway yesterday Island Boy was worried.

"Uh oh!", said he.

Mommy and Daddy continued chatting in the front seat.

"Uh oh!", from the back. Louder this time.

"What's wrong?", I asked.

"Uh oh, truck!"

"What's wrong with the truck?"

"Uh oh-oh! Somebody took off the back!"

Anyone care to guess what was bothering our son?

You guessed it! He saw a semi cab with no trailer on it. (I hope I am using the correct terminology for those things - I'm not exactly much of a "truck person", although I am better versed in truck lingo these days than I've ever been in my life.)

This little boy makes us laugh every single day. I love the way he looks at the world.

The Apple Juice Store

2009-09-23T21:32:00.001-07:00

One of Island Boy's favorite neighborhood adventures is a jaunt to the "Apple Juice Store". No, not the Apple Store, but rather the Apple Juice Store. Never heard of it? Sure you have and I'll bet you have one close to you, no matter where you are.

The Apple Juice Store that Island Boy is referring to is Starbucks and surely you've heard of them, yes?

In Island Boy's world, Starbucks translates to the Apple Juice Store since apple juice is the treat he gets on the rare occasion that he visits one. It's so much fun to see the world through the eyes (and taste buds) of a toddler!

Chinese Horror Story

2009-09-21T22:53:00.000-07:00

If you haven't seen this story yet, prepare yourself to be horrified. I can barely imagine how the people that did this can sleep at night. I cannot imagine how the people to whom this was done can sleep at night and I cannot imagine wondering if my family could be one of the families that might have been part of this despicable behavior.

Here's the story. Read it. I typically like to look on the bright side of any dark situation, but the only good I can find in this is that articles like this one will help to ensure that these crimes will stop if they haven't already.

More Tuba, Please!

2009-09-21T15:23:00.000-07:00

We were sitting around yesterday which is an unusual thing around here on its own when Island Boy said, "I want tuba, please!".

Excuse me? Could he be thinking of Tuba Dad? It's been a while since we've seen them and I'm pretty sure he didn't actually see Tuba Dad in action. Hmm...

"Tuba, please!"

We don't have a tuba, son.

"Tuba. On the TV. Please!"

Puzzled look from me.

"Tuba, Bam!"

"Oh!! You want to see the tuba that was on TV last week, right?"

"Yes! Tuba! Bam!" (this was followed by squeals of delight)

Ohio State fans will recall that just last weekend, one very enthusiastic tuba player dotted the "i" in Script Ohio with such pride and conviction that he unwittingly knocked out the cameraman covering his closeup. 'Twas quite the sight, and rather impressively, both men continued to do their jobs with barely a hiccup.

Enjoy (in both focused and full-length versions)!

Stride Right

2009-09-19T22:33:00.000-07:00

Island Boy got his first "real" bicycle a couple of weeks ago. Oddly enough, it has no pedals.

Stranger still...it is a relatively new invention as far as I can tell (to be honest, I have no idea of the history of the balance bike so if you do, please tell!).

Apparently, the "balance bike", as these types of bikes are called, is better-suited for learning the skills needed to ride a "real" bike (e.g. one with pedals) than say a tricycle or a bicycle with training wheels. Since the real skill one needs to master bike riding is not pedaling (that part is easy), but rather balance, the balance bike makes perfect sense.

Although this all sounds good intellectually, it remains to be seen how it will play out for us. We'll keep you posted.

In the meantime, Island Boy has made amazing strides (har har!) with his new bike. He went from taking it out for long walks (and by that I mean wearing his helmet and literally walking next to his bike the entire time) to walking while straddling it for a portion of each walk to now sitting on the seat and striding with it for the entire walk, comfortably rolling up and down hills.

He has yet to move into the advanced balancing that the bike is designed to encourage, but we're getting there and Island Boy is having a ball along the way, so we couldn't be happier.

First Day of School

2009-09-17T21:10:00.000-07:00

Today was Island Boy's second day at school. The first was on Tuesday, when half of his preschool class had their first day of school (the other half had theirs on Wednesday). He sailed through the day with flying colors as all of the children did. It was the nervous parents that, arguably, didn't do as well.

School philosophies differ. In the case of ours, the separation process is handled with kid gloves, so to speak. It began with several "Transition Days" in June when we showed up for what amounted to something like a play date at the school where we simply got familiar with the environment. Then, last Saturday, just a few days before school started, Island Boy received a letter in the mail. It was a card bearing a picture of his teachers and a little note saying that they were looking forward to seeing him in school. How wonderful is that??!

The next step in the process was a home visit by the teachers the day before school started. Island Boy enjoyed that visit thoroughly. He was the perfect host, offering food and plenty of entertainment.

Finally, the parents are invited to attend class (actually, expected to) for the first week or more, depending on the needs of each of the children. Although this is all set up to ostensibly help the children transition more smoothly, I suspect it is at least as important for some of us parents.

Of course many, if not all, of the parents were both thrilled to see their little ones growing up and going to school, yet a bit sad at the thought of them moving on to another phase in their lives. A new authority figure, the teacher (or teachers, in our case), will now get some of the time, some of the smiles, some of the rewards, some of the affection and respect that had previously been just for us.

To gauge the way the parents were adapting one need only have glanced at the differences in the parents from Tuesday to today. On the first day of school, the parents stood, cameras in hand, lined up like paparazzi, eagerly aiming to capture the moments, to hang on to just that little extra bit of connection with their children as they passed the baton over to the teachers to share in the duty of helping their children grow.

Today, those same parents sat, cameras at rest, while the iPhones came out in full force to pass the time. As one parent observed, we looked like an Apple commercial. And our children played happily nearby, clamoring up on the laps of their teachers, dropping by occasionally to check in with us (or to comfort us??), sensing that we were all beginning to relax into our new roles and knowing that things would never be quite the same.

Air Travel Tips with Tiny Ones

2009-09-10T13:57:00.000-07:00

As someone who has traveled much and often and, more specifically, as someone who has flown with a child on my lap - yes, including internationally, I have some very strong opinions about what works and what doesn't work for us when we travel.

When preparing for traveling with small children, our thoughts usually turn to surviving the trip - that is, surviving the trip without going bonkers. This post isn't about that particular aspect of airplane travel with little ones (however, I do have lots to say about that so will post on that in the near future as well). A post on Delicious Baby got me thinking so this particular post is about surviving serious turbulence.

The FAA suggests holding your infant in front of you as you lean forward over her. Here is what Transport Canada advises on the subject and it sounds ok but potentially difficult to execute.

What's interesting to me is that I've never heard of anyone doing what we do while we're on a plane. I don't know if it's because it hasn't occurred to anyone else (I doubt that) or if it's because I just haven't happened to read about anyone doing it, but it makes sense to us and it feels safer than trying to hold a baby in our hands.

I wear my baby in the Baby Bjorn during plane travel. Yes, usually for the entire trip. It just feels SO much safer than anything else (with the possible exception of purchasing another seat and lugging along the infant car seat, but since I will soon no longer have the option of NOT paying for that extra seat, I'll opt not to for now, thanks!). I doubt that any studies have been done to determine whether or not using the Baby Bjorn (or another similar carrier) is safe during plane travel, but it has to be safer than trying to hold my baby in what sounds like a pretty similar position with no assistance while we're both jostled about in turbulence, right?

Parenting Research

2009-09-10T13:39:00.001-07:00

Here's an interesting article on how sons and daughters may or may not learn parenting from their own parents.

What Kind of Parent are You?

2009-09-01T21:25:00.001-07:00

I don't ask the question to make you wonder whether you're a good parent or a bad parent (Although every parent makes mistakes, very few of us are truly bad parents.), but rather to get you thinking about what kind of parent you'd like to be. What kinds of things do you want to do for your children? What kinds of things might be too much?

Read this article to get you thinking about some of the ramifications of what you might or might not want to do and see whether it changes your mind. Or not.

Bagging Our First Summit

2009-08-24T22:03:00.001-07:00

It is difficult to stand perched atop a mountaintop and not appreciate the beauty that surrounds you.

Unless you are two. If you happen to be two or so, you might instead enjoy the challenge of bagging the "summit" upon the summit - i.e. clamoring up the pile of rocks located near the Ranger's feet. Technically, I guess he had found the highest spot on the mountain, although I'm not sure if temporary structures count. Still, you have to give him credit for going for it.

We bagged our first summit as a family of four last weekend. While riding the gondola to the top was a far cry from the way we conquered summits in the past, it was rewarding nonetheless.

More on BPA

2009-08-23T11:19:00.000-07:00

Read a great summary of the issues and findings with regard to BPA from one of my most trusted sources by clicking here.

SIGG Alert

2009-08-21T14:01:00.001-07:00

If you happen to use the practical and fashionable water bottles by SIGG, you will want to read their statement about BPA content by clicking here. If you have a SIGG bottle manufactured prior to August 2008, you can send an email request to the company for a replacement liner. If you're not sure when your bottle was manufactured, look at the photos here to figure it out.

The bottles really are pretty great to use, so I'm glad they've worked it out (they do claim that even the older bottles were completely safe, but I'm one to be ultra conservative with this sort of thing, so I don't plan to test the theory on my own family).

It does make you wonder what kind of gunk is in pretty much everything we use. For our part, we're trying to eradicate as much plastic as possible from our lives - especially any plastic that touches our food. That isn't easy to do, particularly when it comes to food storage. We also try not to let aluminum foil come into contact with our food. These things aren't easy, but we're doing our best.

And the Holidays Keep on Coming!

2009-08-10T21:08:00.000-07:00

Just when you thought it might be difficult to beat National Donut Day, here it is...(drumroll, please!)...

National S'Mores Day!

Yes, indeed, today is National S'Mores Day, folks!

In case you're reading this on the wee late side and missed it, I checked the etiquette books and it's perfectly fine to celebrate this one a day (or a week or a couple of months) late or even a day (or a week or a couple of months) early, so feel free to grab a couple of graham crackers, toast up the perfect marshmallow and slap it between a couple of slabs of Hershey's chocolate.

Mmm!! I do love them so.

Save the Planet!

2009-08-06T09:09:00.001-07:00

According to a growing movement, if you really want to go green you shouldn't reproduce. And there you have it...not only is adopting a child a wonderful thing for so many other reasons - it is also the right thing to do for the environment.

In all seriousness, it's hard to ignore the fact that babies, while they are in their baby state, seem very bad for the environment what with all of the products they require these days - diapers, toys, car seats, strollers, and on and on and on. I guess we all get even worse for the environment as adults with all of our need for transportation and housing and whatnot. Sooooo...

Be environmentally responsible and adopt a child today! You'll be very, very glad you did.

What I Did On My Summer Vacation

2009-07-16T13:26:00.000-07:00

We spent the last 2 plus weeks in Ohio, visiting family and reveling in the joys of summer in the Midwest.

The best part of the trip was being surrounded by family every day. Island Boy always had cousins, Grandparents and Aunts and Uncles to play with and even though we had some rain and a bit of cooler than expected weather, we still spent the majority of our time running around outdoors in endless stretches of lush grass and at the beach along the smooth sand at the water's edge.

We visited a UNESCO World Heritage Site candidate, a National Park, the world's largest basket, a small town railroad museum and a big city dinosaur museum, watched a parade and fireworks on the 4th of July, read books, saw bald eagles, wild turkeys, baby bunnies, deer and ground hogs in the wild, ate fresh basil from the garden, fresh mulberries from trees and black raspberries and blueberries from backyard vines, roasted marshmallows, dined on local delicacies, sampled handmade ice creams and frozen custards, shopped local farmer's markets and picnicked on the sweetest sweet corn you can imagine, savored beautiful sunsets, climbed trees, chased lightening bugs and - this part really goes without saying - ran around barefoot and threw rocks in the lake.

Yes, Ohio in the summertime is, in my biased opinion, one of life's great pleasures and one that is made even better when it's shared with your children.

Delay Tactics

2009-07-02T21:40:00.000-07:00

Island Boy is a master of creativity. This evening was no exception.

As we prepared for his bedtime, he pulled a new arrow from his quiver and told us he had an "owie" on his toe.

We took a look and indeed there was a bit of a rough edge on one of his toenails, so Daddy went off to get the nail clippers, came back and clipped the offending nail.

All better?

Not so fast!!

"Now, this one!", said Island Boy.

Daddy took a look at the new area of concern and obediently complied with the request. All set?

Not yet!

"This one!", said Island Boy. Once again, Daddy complied.

"This one!", Island Boy said and this time neither Island Boy nor Daddy could keep a straight face as they both realized how ridiculous the game had become. He may not have gotten to bed quite as early as we'd hoped, but we did all have a good giggle along the way.

Nice Shoes!

2009-06-22T22:42:00.000-07:00

Our son has a pair of the ubiquitous Crocs that everyone loves to hate - they are so ugly they're cute. Podiatrists love them or hate them, depending on their point of view (love that they bring in more patients with foot and ankle injuries caused by wearing them, hate that they cause foot and ankle injuries).

While we discourage them for activities that involve lots of walking and forbid them (or at least try to) for anything involving running, we do love them for anytime that Island Boy needs to get in and out of his shoes quickly. Island Boy, like every child, loves Crocs because he can get in and out of them quickly on his own.

We popped in to a restaurant this evening for dinner and when we came out Island Boy spotted another toddler. Before we even noticed what he was commenting on, with all of the admiration and irony appropriate to the situation, Island Boy placed his foot next to the toddler's Croc adorned foot and said,

"Nice shoes!!"

Island Boy's Daddy and I looked at each other. Those Crocs weren't even the same color as Island Boy's Crocs!

We were amazed that Island Boy grasped the irony of the situation and came up with the subtle humor that applied. We have no idea how he could possibly have learned such a thing but it was pretty darn adorable.

Family Festival

2009-06-16T22:46:00.000-07:00

We attended a Family Festival a few weeks ago and Island Boy was in Heaven. Not only did it have tons of activities perfectly suited for persons of his size and age, it also had enough interesting things for Mommy and Daddy to do that Mommy and Daddy didn't get bored too easily. In that sense, it was brilliantly planned.

Upon arrival Island Boy immediately located the Treasure Hunt. Ok, not quite immediately. We had to work our way past the live music first. Fortunately, the live music took a break and we were able to investigate other activities. It wasn't long before we located the reptile show taking place as we walked by.

Island Boy was fascinated with the lizards and snakes and even with a frog (I don't think he was bothered at all that it technically was not a reptile, nor was the millipede) and was thrilled with the opportunity to touch each of these creatures.

It was sometime not long after that that we actually made our way over to the Treasure Hunt where Island Boy rapidly located treasures too numerous to count (ok, there were seven) beneath the sand. It was adorable to see how excited he got over the plastic slugs and brightly colored ceramic disks that served as "treasure".

Island Boy even enjoyed several crafts where he painted and glued to create some beautiful decorations for our home. The event had so many things going on it's difficult to mention them all, but I will say that the ultimate was drumming right along with the musicians on stage. Yes, the live music was meant to be a collaborative masterpiece and drums and other percussion instruments were placed in front of the stage for attendees to play along with the band. Those were some VERY happy children playing along and Island Boy was in his element.

As usual with events as fun as this one, the only complaint we had was that it was very, very difficult to leave and unlike other things we do together as a family, this is not something that comes along all the time, so we won't be able to do it again next week. With any luck though, we may be able to do it again next year.

Same

2009-06-10T17:00:00.001-07:00

One of Island Boy's favorite activities these days is to pick out things that are the same.

It's fascinating to watch him as he drops what he's doing to show me that he understands that the color of his train matches the color of the chair (and the plate and the picture frame and the pillow case and the towel and the tag on the side of my pants and the flyer that came in the mail and the beak on the bird in the picture on page 5 of the book and...) or that the picture of the owl in the book is the same creature as the plastic owl statue that guards our apricot tree in the back yard or that the spider in the book is the same as the arachnid we saw on our walk or that...you get the picture!

While this game is fun, it's even more fun when Island Boy tests us to see if we're paying attention by showing us that something is the same when he knows it is not the same. He always does this with a watchful eye and bursts into laughter when we catch him at it. If we don't catch him at it, he will continue to test us until we finally realize that he's caught us and you cannot help but smile when that happens.

Greatest Holiday Ever

2009-06-06T15:12:00.000-07:00

Yesterday our family celebrated not one, but two special days. In case you missed it, yesterday was National Doughnut Day, a day that could in fact be the greatest holiday ever invented.

What? You've never heard of it, you say?

If that is the case, I can only attribute that to the fact that this holiday is not what one would consider a traditional "Hallmark" holiday. No, unlike Sweetest Day, for example, you need not purchase a $5 card to celebrate. No, you can dispense with worrying about the proper way to say something sweet and with fretting over whether chocolates or flowers or both are required to convey the proper sentiment.

No, on National Doughnut Day it is very clear what you must do to celebrate!

Eat doughnuts!!

You gotta love that.

Future Librarian

2009-06-02T12:47:00.000-07:00

Island Boy is a budding Librarian. Our evening book time is rapidly becoming "An Evening at the Library".

It began with Island Boy's surfboard stool. He pulled it up to his book shelf one night to select a book. He then shuffled it over in front of his "audience" (aka Daddy, Baby Sister and I), sat down, opened his book and held it open for us to see.

He didn't stop there. No, he held the book high and turned slowly from side to side, making sure that each member of the audience, including teddy bear, duckie, turtle and more, got a good look at it before turning to the next page and repeating the procedure.

Our Librarian is taking his self-assigned position very seriously. He does not stop with one book, nor did he stop when we moved his surfboard stool to another room. No, he simply found another lectern and kept right on going.

While it is adorable, it is a very effective method for delaying bedtime, so Mommy and Daddy are trying to have shift the Librarian's schedule accordingly.

Two Puppies

2009-06-01T03:18:00.000-07:00

Picture this:

Island Boy approaches with a note card (held vertically) and a crayon.

"Two rice?", he asks, taking your order.

"Yes, please.", you say.

"Two rice.", says Island Boy, nodding and writing.

"And two puppies?", Island Boy adds.

Yes, that's right, folks. Island Boy has learned that the key to getting what you want is to be adorable when you request it. In this particular case, he had help from a friend we'll call "Uncle E". Thanks, Uncle E, for the help on this one.

As for the order for puppies?

Hmm...not sure we're ready for that just yet, but we'll take it under consideration!

Shootin' with the Big Girls

2009-05-26T10:57:00.000-07:00

We were invited to a friend's home for a traditional Memorial Day BBQ and Island Boy was in heaven. The house had a pool and a dog and people that love children.

Island Boy was having so much fun he decided to grab Mommy's camera and give the two professional photographers in the group some serious competition.

We're having fun reviewing the HUNDREDS of photos reflecting Island Boy's view of the world. Here are just a few for you to enjoy!

Heartbeat

2009-05-12T17:12:00.001-07:00

We were examining a deck of playing cards last week when I pointed out that the red things in the corners of certain cards were called, "hearts".

"Boom! Boom!", Island Boy stated.

"Huh?", thought I.

"Boom! Boom!", he told me again. Then, when I continued to look puzzled, he clarified by pointing to my tummy and saying:

"Heartbeat! Boom! Boom!"

Yes, Island Boy remembers listening to the heartbeat of his little sister while she was still inside of Mommy, so now whenever we see cards (or anything else) with a heart on it, "Boom! Boom!", is what we hear.

Mothers, Daughters and so much more

2009-05-08T16:55:00.000-07:00

It's the season for reflecting on what it means to be a mother, a daughter, a family and even a wife. This year, there is much to consider beyond that of other years.

This year, we have two incredible children in our home. They came to us in very different ways yet they are both miracles to us. Does it matter how they came to us? Does it make any difference in the definition of motherhood or that of grandmother-hood? No, not one tiny nanobit.

I have finally learned that as with so many things in life understanding what it means to be a mom is something you cannot fully comprehend until you are one. The things that define motherhood are not the particulars of how it came to be, but rather the daily struggles and pleasures that we share with our children as we guide them through the river of experiences that mold them. Motherhood is so much more than giving birth and so much more than the thrill of first steps, first words, first haircuts.

Motherhood means that I am the one with the privilege of sharing the joys and pains of growing up as they manifest themselves through tantrums, through smiles and through hugs so powerful you cannot understand how they can come from such tiny arms or fingers (as is the case with our tiny sweet daughter). I am the one that gets through my days and nights without sleep, without checking off the "high-priority" items on my to-do list and without reward other than the best reward of all:

In the dark of night, when the ladybug monster climbs into bed with my son, "Mommy!", is the cry that wakens me. Other times, nay, often times, I hear the cries of my tiny daughter and know that I am the only one that can sooth her. As I tear myself from my dreams (on the occasional night when I am not too exhausted to have dreams), I think first of what it means to be loved and needed enough to be the one whose name is called. And smile. That is what it means to be a Mom.

Thank you, Mom, for being the one that I still call and thank you, A-Ma, for being there for all of us too.

Happy Mother's Day to every one of you reading this with extra special wishes for all of you that are still waiting!

Prepare to Be Embarassed

2009-04-30T12:00:00.001-07:00

A good friend of mine and mother of three shared this sage admonition while we were still waiting to become parents:

"Prepare to be embarrassed!"

I asked her to elaborate and she offered only, "You just wait!".

Today we had a small glimpse of what that could mean to us. On our way in to the doctor's office, we found ourselves walking behind a woman that had a unique gate. We didn't give it a second thought until we observed Island Boy walking at the same cadence as the lady and with the identical tilt and bend of the knees.

It was obvious that he found this way of walking to be very interesting and wanted to try it on for size. It was also one of the funniest things you've ever seen as long as no feelings were hurt in the process. Daddy and I kept our amusement between ourselves and Island Boy soon tired of the game but left an image in our minds that we won't soon forget.

Cement Mixer

2009-04-15T16:54:00.001-07:00

It *is* a pretty dynamite cement mixer, isn't it??

Proud Big Brother

2009-04-06T09:42:00.000-07:00

Island Boy has had the past six days or so to settle in to his new role as Big Brother and I cannot tell you how proud of him I am.

While he will proudly run over to introduce his little sister to any visitors and he knows that giving her a gentle kiss on the cheek or head produces very positive reactions, it's obvious he's doing it for more than a reaction. When we're alone, just us four, Island Boy is just as eager to kiss her, to cuddle with her, to care for her as he is when he is doing it in front of company.

He even takes great care of his little sister when she's not even in the room. He is happy to pretend she's in her car seat. He will check on her and offer her some pretend milk and he's even super gentle with the pretend version of his little sister.

He loves to hold her hand, or gently stroke her hair and give her hugs. Apparently, he was even been telling all of his friends at the park about the latest family addition, too.

We're not sure if all of this behavior has anything at all to do with the fact that his little sister gave him a cement mixer as a present when he came to visit her in the hospital for the first time, but I'm sure that didn't hurt.

Baby Sister

2009-03-31T21:23:00.000-07:00

Island Boy got a new baby sister today. He seems excited and even supportive. At the very least, he's very interested.

He's already learned to be very gentle with her and given her several kisses while marveling at the size of her tiny hands holding on to his. It's magical to see them together.

We're all doing fine, although eager to get home from the hospital.

Lil Sis

2009-03-27T16:30:00.000-07:00

Island Boy is expecting a little sister any minute now. He seems genuinely excited and has an amazing intuition about what is about to take place.

For the past few months, he has correctly identified items that are specifically for his little sister even if we have not pointed out that that is their purpose in advance.

We're all a bit excited and a bit terrified. Life is about to change for us once again and we couldn't be happier.

The Very Hungry Caterpillar

2009-03-20T14:40:00.000-07:00

In case you missed it, and if you happen to be reading this post on the day it is being posted (3/20/09), check out the Google homepage today. Seriously, how cute is that??

Ok, if you happened to miss it, you can get a little idea of just how cute it was by clicking here. See what I mean?? Sooo cute! I also cannot believe that that book sells a copy once every 30 seconds somewhere in the world! Isn't that crazy? It's been 40 years since it was published. I'm not saying it's not a great book - we love it, but WOW!!

Paperwork Surprise!

2009-03-19T22:20:00.000-07:00

Today the whole family happened to be together as we opened the mail. Since we recently ordered a number of things from our Vital Records office, I was only slightly suspicious of a certain parcel from that entity. I only paused briefly before opening it, thinking that we had already received everything that we had ordered from them.

Can you guess what it was?? I didn't and probably for good reason.

Although we would have liked to have a birth certificate for Island Boy over a year ago, we weren't able to request one until almost a year ago and we were told we would be waiting up to a year for it. When I last checked on the status of that document over a month ago, I was told that with the budget crisis in California (and the nation), staffing cutbacks meant that birth certificate processing was being delayed more than ever, so I hung up the phone and prepared for a continuing wait, thinking that it might be another six months or even more.

Both my husband and my son stopped what they were doing when they heard my reaction to seeing our son's birth certificate there in my hands. WOW!! What a THRILL! Could this really be it??!

We had a mini-celebration.

Why did this particular document make us so happy? It wasn't new information to us and it didn't really change anything legally. What it did was represent the final chapter in a long road of paperwork. Oh, I hate to say that because as soon as I do, another challenge will present itself, but still, whatever that document meant, it felt good to hold it and to know that all of the paperwork - all of it - has been worth it.

Now we're off to get our little Island Boy a new passport!

Did he just gerund??

2009-03-18T16:12:00.000-07:00

While enjoying a lovely ride in our car on Sunday, our son requested his magnetic writing tablet. (What are those things called anyway??)

"Write!", he said, indicating he wanted his tablet.
Ok, son, here ya go...
and we handed him his tablet.

A few moments later, Daddy and I were back in our conversation when Island Boy declared, "writing!".

"Did he just gerund?!", Daddy asked.

Yes. Yes, I believe he did.

I'm not sure which should impress me more - I mean, how did my husband find that word floating around in his head?? I admit it's been a while since I've used the word, "gerund", and unless you happen to be an English teacher I'm guessing it's been a while since you have, too. :-)

Whale Watching

2009-03-10T09:20:00.000-07:00

We got away for a day in Santa Barbara over the weekend. While Santa Barbara is always a beautiful place, on this particular day it was amazing.

We had the rare treat of watching a young gray whale frolic in the bay. He was there for hours (or days??). Of course, we have a toddler, so we watched for "minutes" and enjoyed it all. Island Boy was captivated. Who wouldn't be?

Unfortunately, there was some controversy as kayakers and even boaters in relatively large vessels crowded in for a closer look. The whale was surfacing *very* close to some of those kayaks and I'm sure it was a genuine thrill for them.

Luckily, we had a tremendous and close up view of the Cetacean from the wharf - not quite the same as being in a kayak, but certainly dryer and more reliable!

As Island Boy said, "Amazing!!!"

Nametags

2009-02-19T22:13:00.001-08:00

We've been attending a class which requires each child to locate their name tag among all of the children's name tags when we enter the classroom each week.

The teacher patiently guides each student to the correct name tag each week and the parents happily pin them on. While the students are all under the age of three, it turns out that this exercise has not been entirely in vein.

This past week I watched in amazement as Island Boy walked over to the name tags and, before teacher or Mommy could intervene, he correctly selected his own name tag amongst all the choices! I'm the first to admit that Island Boy is not yet reading (nor should he be), but the fact that he may be able to recognize his own name (even in this entirely unscientific and very limited "experiment") is pretty exciting. Of course, I'm trying to restrain my excitement a bit as I wait to see if he does it again...

First Haircut

2009-02-17T21:27:00.000-08:00

Island Boy had his first haircut this past weekend. Yes, he's now TWO and just getting his first haircut.

We couldn't help it - he was so cute we didn't know who to trust with his precious locks. Finally, we received a recommendation and gave a place specializing in children's haircuts a chance.

Their technique involves throwing every possible distraction at a child. Those distractions included a chair shaped like a rocket ship, endless books and toys that were given to him in groups of 3 or 4 (I found this puzzling and stressful. The poor kid only has 2 hands and he couldn't figure out how to hold all of these items let alone enjoy them before a new group was foisted upon him.), animal crackers given at the halfway and "nearly done" points and a very loud television blaring Sponge Bob. Island Boy sat calmly through all of this, but honestly, Mommy was seriously overwhelmed with it all.

The final result? Island Boy still looks adorable, although definitely a bit older. As much fun as it is to watch him grow up, it's also bitter sweet. It happens so quickly.

Opera

2009-02-17T17:29:00.000-08:00

Island Boy has always loved music. Before he could speak, he would make his desires clear if Mommy was listening to too much talk radio in the car, for example.

Recently, he's found a new way to make his preferences clear. Although it is probably the least represented genre in our home music library, Island Boy's most frequent request of late is:

"Opera, please!"

He will also occasionally ask for "Classical" or "Rock, Roll", but for whatever reason, the boy does love his opera. Apparently Mommy and Daddy need to shop or some opera music to update the collection!

Preschool Tryouts

2009-02-12T01:54:00.001-08:00

I've been to three preschool functions in less than a week. That's correct, we're not yet *IN* preschool, but I have found myself hustling back and forth to a variety of activities. Although technically not mandatory, these functions are, in fact, a test of the level of commitment one is willing to offer to a particular school. I'm not complaining. In all fairness, these activities are, for the most part, fun. Still, if you had told me a few years ago what was required or preschool entry, I doubt I would have believed it.

Yes, this is the season for preschool decisions - the time during which preschool directors are reviewing applications for Fall admissions and deciding which lucky families will be a part of their programs beginning next Fall.

For parents, it can be overwhelming. Fortunately, Island Boy and his future classmates are blissfully ignorant of the many hoops their parents are jumping through in an effort to secure their spots. Oh, to be 2 again!!

Storms

2009-02-07T16:01:00.000-08:00

Tantrums? What tantrums? None here! Ok, maybe a few...so when those few crop up, I try to remember the following beautiful sentiment.

I found this to be lovely. One of my favorite blogs adapted it from the Tao De Jing:

The whirlwind's spent before the morning ends;
The storm will pass before the day is done.
Who made them, wind and storm? Heaven and earth.
If heaven itself cannot storm for long,
What matter, then, the storms of man?

Young Comic

2009-01-31T22:40:00.000-08:00

Last night, Island Boy placed his hands on his lower back, arched his back, stretched out his belly, looked down at his belly button and said, "Mei Mei" (that's Mandarin for "little sister").

Yes, my darling son has noticed that Mommy's belly is sticking waaaaaaay out and he was actually imitating me!!!

Fortunately, Mommy can take a joke and we all got a good laugh. Hopefully, he will use discretion when delivering such commentary in public.

The Paperchase Continues...

2009-01-31T09:03:00.001-08:00

We've been home for nearly a year and a half. We've completed all of our social worker visits, been officially recognized as a family by the governments of two countries and even received a US flag that had flown over the US Capitol building in celebration.

So, are we good to go?
Of course not!

We received a notice in the mail (or rather, Island Boy did) that we must appear in court once again if we'd like to receive proof of our son's citizenship. We must also bring a certified copy of each of our birth certificates and a certified copy of our marriage certificate along with certified copies of all court documents relating to our case and I'm sure a few other items I'm forgetting as I type. We've sent off to all of the appropriate places and have our fingers crossed that we'll receive all of the required documentation in time for our court date.

You know, I was kind of feeling like I needed a little something extra to keep me busy. :-)

Best Software Ever

2009-01-28T16:56:00.000-08:00

As a former software engineer and generally voracious consumer of technology, I have seen and used a lot of software in my lifetime. Yesterday I installed what I am fairly certain is the Best Software Ever!!!

If you are not yet a Mac user, stop reading this post right now and go purchase a Mac. I'm serious. You need one in order to get iLife and you need iLife in order to use the amazing iPhoto '09. Yes, I think the Best Software Ever may be iPhoto '09. Ok, ok, I'm sure there are many other amazing applications out there that are making the world a better place, but there is nothing as fun and easy and just plain crazy genius out there today as iPhoto '09. (No, I do not work for Apple although I did work for Microsoft.)

What makes iPhoto '09 so much FUN??!! It recognizes faces and catalogs them for you, so if you, for example, have oh, let's just say 30,000 pictures or so in your digital library (ahem!), you don't have to go through all 30,000 by hand to figure out which ones your little loved ones (or your big loved ones) are in. You simply find a picture that has the face you want to identify in it; you name it, and voila! iPhoto presents you with many of the other photos that that person is in. So. Much. FUN!!

I admit it's not flawless, but even that was part of the fun. It was fun watching the software sift through all of our digital pictures (this process took hours given the number of pictures we have) and pick out the faces. Once it was done, it was fun seeing which faces it thought belonged together - it mostly guessed correctly and we got some good chuckles when it didn't.

If I seem a bit giddy, it's because I am. If you're a PC or haven't installed your copy yet, you can at least enjoy a demo by clicking here.

Chopsticks

2009-01-28T05:46:00.000-08:00

Island Boy insists on doing pretty much everything we do. The results of his efforts are somewhat mixed.

However, in the use of chopsticks, he is determined and, with a little help from a piece of plastic, gets the job done with surprising skill.

Play Dough

2009-01-26T16:43:00.000-08:00

My son located a rock-hard ball of play dough and presented it to me.

Squeeze!, he commanded.

I can't squeeze it, I told him. I went on to explain that the play dough was all dried out because we didn't put it back in the container.

Island Boy considered the evidence and, in a leap that wouldn't be made by most adults, responded with a very logical, "Wash, please!"

Ah, the world is sometimes much simpler than it seems to those of us that have been in it for a while! I'm glad our children are here to remind us of that and to give us good reason to smile along the way.

Bye Bye Tree

2009-01-20T16:40:00.000-08:00

"Bye, bye, tree!", he said. It really seemed like one of the saddest things I had ever heard: Island Boy saying goodbye to the Christmas tree. It was a sad sight to see.

We tried to help him through the transition by taking the candy canes and ornaments off the tree, wrapping them all securely (except for the candy canes, of course) and storing them away for next year. We told him we'd have another tree next year and explained that we'd soon have other things to celebrate, including his birthday. In the end, he seemed to feel a little better when he picked up the Christmas tree-shaped rosemary bush from our front yard, carried it in to the house and placed it where the Christmas tree had been. It wasn't quite the same, but at least it was something that would last for just a little while longer.

And yes, I know, I know! I haven't even written about putting the tree up yet and it was already time to say goodbye to the tree. That's the way the holidays worked out this year - I wasn't quite ready for them and, in a flash, they were over. *sigh*

Technical Difficulties

2009-01-19T15:06:00.000-08:00

You may have noticed that things have been a little quiet here lately. It's not that things have actually been quiet around here, of course! We have a toddler in the house. How could they be??

No, we've been experiencing technical difficulties of the sort that so often accompany the busiest times in our lives. Yes, I have managed once again to completely overwhelm my computer's storage devices. Tens of thousands of digital pictures will do that and they will typically do that at the least opportune time.

So, after yet another addition to our home Tera Monster (see note below), we are nearly back at work here at Island Boy and my, do we have some serious catching up to do!!

Note: Years ago (yes, more than I care to recall), I visited the data farm of one of the world's leading corporations. They proudly showed me the massive room housing their data farm. They lovingly referred to it as the "Tera monster". It was impressive for its time, but the same amount of storage today would fit rather neatly into the rather smallish room where I now sit. My, how things have changed!

Horse Dog

2009-01-07T22:18:00.000-08:00

Shortly before Christmas, Island Boy woke up to see this in his living room. A gift from dear friends, it is a larger-than-life size replica of a Bernese Mountain Dog. In fact, it is about three times the size of our Bernese Mountain Dog.

Island Boy stood back, warily observing the thing.

"Horse!", he declared.

I see your point, son. He continued to study the thing and soon declared, "Bus!". Wow, another great choice!

Yes, as large as a horse (or a bus) but in the likeness of a dog, this creature defies definition, so we now refer to it as the "horse dog". It was just one of the many highlights of our holidays this year and Island Boy still doesn't know quite what to make of it.

Big Red Barn

2009-01-02T22:18:00.000-08:00

I happened to be browsing the maternity clothes in Target's online store when I noticed a very curious thing...a rather...shall we say, "overweighted" selection of red items. Upon further inspection, I found that the color of the items bore the label "Barn Red".

Now anyone that knows anything at all about marketing can tell you that labels matter and anyone that knows anything at all about women can tell you that most of us, pregnant or not, would prefer not to be compared to a large, broad structure - particularly not one meant for housing farm animals.

No, Target, as much as I love you, "Barn Red" was not your finest example of marketing prowess and thus it is no surprise that one can find an unusual number of items in the color "Barn Red" in the clearance section of Target's website.

64 Degrees

2008-12-30T22:10:00.000-08:00

It was 64 degrees the day after Christmas, but not here. Care to take a guess where? Would you imagine it was in Ohio? Yes, outdoors in Ohio!! Northern Ohio!!

While LA has been experiencing a bit of a cold snap, Ohio was enjoying an after Christmas meltdown of the good weather kind. Snow for Christmas and warmth the day after? Perfect!

Of course this is the year we stayed in LA, but we're not complaining. We've had gorgeous, albeit cold, weather here over the last few weeks. It rained (something that many of us here in LA actually look forward to - especially if we don't have to drive in it) and that meant a fresh batch of snow on the mountains and clean air all around.

LA after a good rain looks like a different place with snow-capped mountains in clear view from the beach. In fact, you can get to the snow from the beach in two hours or less (traffic permitting) and that is exactly what we did today. We poked sticks in the snow, made a snowman and watched the big kids on their makeshift sleds. Not exactly a white Christmas, but a lovely day nonetheless.

Best Hotel Setup

2008-12-27T19:44:00.001-08:00

Over the Thanksgiving holiday, we stayed at a couple of hotels. This one won the award for best baby amenities with a full line-up of baby shampoo, lotion and powder in a fully equipped pack-and-play. Believe it or not we've actually stayed at a pretty nice hotel that offered a crib with no crib bedding, so we take no baby-related amenity for granted and we especially appreciate the facility that goes the extra step to provide something nice.

Snow! Snow!

2008-12-17T03:56:00.000-08:00

Island Boy had his first real experience with snow over the Thanksgiving holiday. We traveled to Ohio to spend time with our family there and we enjoyed just about every form of precipitation possible. It rained; it snowed and it hailed. Island Boy loved it.

Although we didn't have nearly as much ground cover as we would have liked, Island Boy managed to find the piles of snow and explore them thoroughly. He stomped on them, made snowballs out of them, played King of the Hill on them and generally had a great time.

We had a wonderful visit with Grandma and Grandpa, Uncles, Aunts and cousins and we can't wait to see them all again.

Holiday Travel

2008-12-15T07:56:00.000-08:00

We can travel the world for months at a time and never manage to get sick, but fly to Ohio over the holidays, and I get sick every time. This year was no exception other than I got sick early this year since we traveled early. We're back and nearly healthy and we have so much news to catch up on! So, watch these pages for Island Boy news...it's on its way!

Thankful

2008-11-25T03:53:00.000-08:00

We have so much to be thankful for...today and every day.

Lobster Bones

2008-11-18T09:41:00.000-08:00

Island Boy enjoyed a nice dinner out with family a few nights ago. His favorite part of the meal was gnawing on a lobster leg.

"Bone!", Island Boy pointed out.

No, I explained, that was a shell. I went on to describe a shell as something that was on the outside, while bones were generally found inside.

Island Boy turned, pointed to the window and said, "Outside!".

Hmm. Good point.

No, I said, shells were outside of a creature, not outside of a building.

Island Boy pointed out the window and confirmed, "Outside!".

As I pondered the best way to clear up the misunderstanding, Daddy wisely decided to just go with it, and offered Island Boy another "lobster bone".

"Bone!", Island Boy declared happily.

We all smiled and enjoyed the rest of our meal since, as anyone that is the parent of a toddler knows...when Island Boy is happy, we're all happy!

Ashes Ashes

2008-11-16T21:46:00.000-08:00

LA and Orange County are ablaze and hundreds of homes have been lost.

In our area, we are far from the fires, but not from their effects. To add to the strangeness of the already too early Christmas decorations and music (didn't they used to wait until the day after Thanksgiving for those??!) we've had light "snow" showers in the form of ash fluttering down upon us. The skies have darkened with the smoke and the sun has taken on an apocalyptic hue.

The air is bad - very very bad - but we are otherwise all fine and hoping for the fires to soon be under control.

Flag Day

2008-11-08T08:36:00.000-08:00

Island Boy loves flags. Along one of our regular driving routes we get to see a very large American flag. Each time we approach it, Island Boy excitedly says, "Flag! Flag!", as soon as it comes into view. As soon as we've passed it and it is no longer within view, he says, "More, please!". I always tell him we'll see it again soon.

Today an American Flag was flown over the US Capitol in honor of Island Boy. We have now been home for over a year. We couldn't think of a more appropriate gift to commemorate this very special occasion.

It's been a pretty incredible year. Island Boy has grown and changed so much. He's a truly amazing and very happy person and that makes all of us very happy.

"Wow."

2008-11-05T04:37:00.000-08:00

This was the single word uttered by Island Boy as he watched the crowd in Grant Park cheering and waving American flags in anticipation of the results of this historic election. Island Boy normally doesn't get to watch television and he was clearly moved by the scene.

Regardless of your political views, it is difficult to deny the hope and desire for change that drove this election. In the end, the race wasn't about race and that is as it should be.

Wow, indeed.

Mommy Vacations

2008-10-30T22:06:00.000-07:00

One of the things I learned in my parenting class is that it's ok, nay necessary, for a Mom to take a vacation. Hurray!! Of course the definition of "vacation" in this case is quite a stretch by the standards of most. Our sage instructor did point out right away that there would be no three week vacations to Hawaii. No, none of that while one has small children at home. Oh. Drat!

So what does qualify as a Mommy Vacation? Here are some examples:

1) Taking a shower. (No kidding!!! I know plenty of women who prior to becoming mothers had been meticulously hygienic, but taking a shower is one of those things you just don't always have time for as a mom. So, when you do get one it can feel like a real treat and you really learn to enjoy it.)
2) Taking a walk. (ANY walk - not even a long one!)
3) The ultimate indulgence??? A night out with your spouse!!

How can these three things possibly qualify as a vacation? According to Merriam-Webster the definition of the word, "vacation" is:

1 a respite or a time of respite from something:intermission
2 a scheduled period during which activity (as of a court or school) is suspended, a period of exemption from work granted to an employee
3 a period spent away from home or business in travel or recreation

Although prior to being a mom my definition of "vacation" would have always trended heavily towards #3, it is now clear that #1 is the only real definition of "vacation" for Mommies and Daddies. So, Mommies and Daddies, enjoy your "vacations" whatever form they may take and whenever you manage to get them!

We're All the Same No Matter How Old

2008-10-26T21:05:00.000-07:00

We were having a nice chat about parenthood with the father of two boys when we uncovered the revelation that no matter what age we are, it's always the same. No matter what age we are, we're always testing our limits and the limits of those around us.

At two or so, Island Boy may look right at us while performing an act he knows we won't approve of. The little darling is an expert at looking adorable while he dumps his entire box of crayons on the floor, for example.

At twenty-two or so, we're all still doing silly things like staying out too late despite being perfectly aware of the consequences the next day. At fifty-two or so, people are still testing limits with themselves and with their spouses. Hmm...I wonder what will happen if I don't take out the trash?

I'm sure at eighty-two or ninety-two or even at one hundred and two, if we're all lucky enough to be around that long, we'll still be testing our limits. Our limits are always changing and so are we, so why not?? This is one "phase" we apparently never outgrow.

Amazing Fact

2008-10-20T22:06:00.000-07:00

I heard on the radio that Californians use an average of 40% less electricity than the average American uses. FORTY PERCENT! That seems like a LOT!

I considered the reasons why this might be true. I'm sure it has something to do with the generally mild climate that much (although not all) of the state experiences for much of the year. There are many areas of the state where we can get by with no air conditioning at all and possibly even with no heat all year. We are fortunate enough to have lots of sunny days (don't let the word on this get around!), so I think we can even get by without turning on the lights much of the time, too.

Still, the state also has Death Valley (where I'm pretty sure both air conditioning and heat are required, although there are probably relatively fewer residents there than in Greater Los Angeles) and the Sierras (where I'm pretty sure heat is a requirement during the winter months, but perhaps they all use natural gas for that).

The reporter suggested that it might also have something to do with the general increased environmental sensitivity or awareness of Californians relative to much of the country. (I wonder if there are any statistics on that?) Whatever the reasons, I found it interesting. Now if only we can all work on reducing our dependency on oil...

Market Meltdown

2008-10-15T15:36:00.000-07:00

No, not that one. This one happened at the local Farmer's Market.

It all started innocently enough. I asked Island Boy if he'd like to go to the Farmer's Market. He said, "yes!" and nodded enthusiastically. It was going to be a quick visit. It really was. I only needed a few items and I knew exactly where to find them.

The troubles began when my normally excellent Parking Karma failed us. Instead of finding a lovely spot right where I wanted to be we circled and circled, narrowly missing a few choice spots as they opened up. Fine. Parking Karma or no, we finally found ourselves a spot (with time on the meter to make up for the lack of market proximity) and strolled towards the market.

I suppose there might have been some hints even at that early stage that something might go awry, but I wasn't picking up on them if they did exist. Instead, we managed to arrive at the first farmer's stand only to find the item we sought wasn't among the offerings for the day. Strike One!!

"Juice?", Island Boy requested. "We'll get some juice on the way back to the car, ok?", said me. Bad move.

Off we went to pick up an herb salad. Ah! That went well!! Next stop? Grapes. Island Boy loves grapes, but this is when things began to fall apart. There I was with a bunch of grapes in one hand and a semi-boneless toddler in the other and I realized our time was up. Whether I was done or not, we were done with the market for the day.

I attempted to derail the meltdown with the promised juice. That worked! Ah, but it was only a temporary patch. We hightailed it back to the car, but the car was too far and the meltdown too fierce.

Why? Maybe it was the juice, maybe not. We may never know, but I imagine it had something to do with the fact that Mommy had a plan. Ha! What was I thinking?!

Parenting Paradox

2008-10-11T21:47:00.000-07:00

I've been attending a parenting class. The class lasts for several weeks and it takes up several hours on a weekday evening. I was pretty surprised to learn that I was in the minority as one of the few in attendance who didn't have their spouse in tow. I felt fortunate that I was able to get hubby home from work early enough to enjoy a boys night at home so I could attend the classes, but as I looked around the room I couldn't help but whether all of the couples in the class have nannies or family nearby or what??

It turns out to be a pretty interesting class and one that is well-suited for couples (yet not to the detriment of the few of us attending without our spouses). Still, it seems a paradox to spend time away from one's child in order to learn to be a better parent. Can we become better parents by spending time away? That's what we're all hoping.

Farm Animals

2008-10-01T03:36:00.000-07:00

I've often found it funny that one of the first things we teach our children is to recognize and perform the sounds that various farm animals make. Just how critical is this particular skill to surviving in today's world? As far as I can tell for most of us, not very. Still, for some reason we do it; they love it; the cycle continues.

Fortunately, we were prepared when we attended the LA County Fair last week. Island Boy was ready with his full repertoire of farm animal noises despite having seen very few farm animals in his short lifetime prior to this excursion.

(Tangent: One day Island Boy had a bite of beef on his fork and I told him that it was beef and that beef came from cows. He looked at me, looked at the beef, said, "MOO!!", and shoved it in his mouth. Very cute!!)

We spent much of our visit in the Big Red Barn where cows, sheep, pigs, goats, chickens and even a few farm dogs all roamed in large enclosures along with their babies. We listened for the crow of the rooster and the snorting of the pigs and watched the animals as they ate, drank, slept and played.

We enjoyed petting two docile creatures in a small pen off to the side of the festivities and learned that they were not cows as I (and apparently most visitors to the Fair) had assumed. No, one was actually a miniature yak and the other a zebu! How cool is that? I was not prepared to share with Island Boy the associated noises that these furry friends make and they didn't help me out while we were there. Although I had no idea the zebu was from South Africa until the nice lady tending to him told me so, I was able to correctly identify the geographic origin of the yak. (Thinking about the geographic origins of these two made me wonder why someone thought to pen them together...) Island Boy loved the yak and spent a good amount of time stroking its fur and exploring its little horns(!).

For reasons that I have yet to understand, the horses were nowhere to be found in the Big Red Barn, so we walked a painful distance - all the way to the other side of the Fair so that I could show Island Boy the Clydesdales, a team of horses that has always impressed me with their size and beauty. Unfortunately, our trek was not well-rewarded. While the horses were beautiful, each stood in a separate and what appeared to be a much-too-small stall with bars all the way up and the public was kept well away from them. It just didn't have the same impact as getting up close and looking one of them in the eye, or standing close enough to gain full appreciation of the size of one hoof (think very large dinner plate).

After visiting the Clydesdales, I still felt like we were missing out unless we managed to get up close to a real horse, so we located the California Mustangs. I was hoping to see an impressive herd of them galloping across the plains (ok, just kidding here, but seriously, how cool would that be??), but once again, the public was kept well back from the horses. They were in larger quarters than the Clydesdales and the bars did not extend to the ceiling, but the experience wasn't quite what I'd hoped. Let's just say the environment did not exactly convey, "wild and free".

On our way back to the Big Red Barn we had the pleasure of petting a chicken so fluffy there seemed to be nothing to it but fluff and we also explored the lovely skin of a Bearded Dragon. We hit the Big Red Barn one more time on our way out for a final rewarding visit to our farm animal friends. Although he insisted he was not ready to leave, Island Boy was asleep in his car seat before we were back on the freeway.

The Sky is Falling

2008-09-29T17:23:00.000-07:00

Over the past few weeks, it's been impossible to avoid thinking about the state of our world today. As much as I'd like to go about my daily life believing that everything will be fine, I'm having a tough time thinking about what the future will be like for our children in both the near term as well as the longer term and I worry about our parents and those that are nearing retirement and relying on their nest eggs.

As it stands, we have just experienced the largest one-day drop ever in the stock market, the earth is undergoing climate change that is impacting everything from oceans to polar bears (and those are just a few of the things we can already see, measure and know) and our country is involved in two wars and contemplating another. How could things have gotten this bad?

I don't know what this presidential election will bring and I don't know whether anyone can really turn this ship around soon enough. I do know that if I were a candidate for president right now I would be rethinking my decision. I'm glad that someone is willing to step up and take the job and I hope that it is someone that can return our country and the world to peace and prosperity.

Please think about what's important to you. Is it the economy? Is it foreign policy? Is it health care? Is it the environment? If you know what's important to you, please educate yourself about which candidate shares your views. Don't rely on soundbites. Watch the debates. Go to the candidate websites. And please, VOTE.

Scotch Rocks

2008-09-23T21:47:00.000-07:00

Island Boy has had a Scottish nanny for several months now. To be honest, she hasn't really been a nanny for us - more like a babysitter - but it's fun to say that he has a Scottish nanny and she is an actual nanny for a living, so it's not *that* much of a stretch.

In any case, it seems that she may have been his first crush and due to family circumstances (hers, not ours), she won't be seeing us much any more. We're sad to see her go, but we're sure Island Boy will be ok. As my grandfather always said, "She ain't the only peach on the beach".

The Aisle of the Moaning Dolls

2008-09-22T03:10:00.000-07:00

We were in Target, perhaps my favorite store, not long ago and I made the mistake of wandering through the Aisle of the Moaning Dolls. I did not know I was about to enter the Aisle when I turned the corner from checking out the trucks and Play-Dough. I just wanted to explore this new section of the store to see what I'd been missing out on over the years.

Things in the Aisle of the Moaning Dolls were pink and frilly as you might expect, and I did not linger. Yet, as I passed, noises began to emerge from the shelves that sent chills up my spine. I was literally too creeped out to turn around and see what was happening. Whatever it was, I wanted nothing to do with it.

I don't know what's happened to dolls these days, but whatever that was, it didn't sound good to me. Realistic? Perhaps when you're dealing with them in smaller numbers, but to me an entire Aisle of them was just plain creepy. This was one occasion when I was happy that I didn't have a little girl to draw me back to the Aisle. I shan't wander there again.

Signed, Sealed, Delivered!!

2008-09-20T07:05:00.000-07:00

He's ours! Of course he's been ours now for years (it seems, although it's truly only been months(!), but the paperwork is now officially complete.

I cannot tell you how strange and wonderful it feels to be able to say that! From this day forward, our family need not send personal information to outside parties. Yes, that last piece of nagging paperwork: a one year follow-up, has been completed slightly ahead of schedule. It's not that it was difficult. It's just that it existed.

Now? Done! Finito! Hao le!

Aaaaah!

Citizenship

2008-09-16T07:10:00.000-07:00

Well, we ventured in to downtown LA once again to apply for our little citizen's proof of citizenship. Why? While they tell us it isn't necessary, they don't really mean it.

For example, in order to apply for a US Passport (something we wouldn't even consider NOT doing although a shockingly small percentage of Americans hold them - heck, even the possible future leader of the free world, Sarah Palin, didn't have a passport until just last year!!), we must provide proof of US Citizenship. How do you prove you're a US Citizen? Normally, one would provide a copy of one's birth certificate. Easy? Of course not!

It is true that we should receive a copy of our little one's birth certificate sometime in the next year, but we don't have it now. We have other documents in our possession that should serve the purpose, but as the Wicked Witch of Social Security demonstrated, the reliability of those documents as proof is questionable in many (most?) situations. It's not that the documents aren't legitimate. It is simply that many government workers and others with an interest in such matters are unfamiliar with them and with the variations in the laws and documents from state to state.

Why is a passport important? Here's just one reason other than the fact that it is a relatively easy and reliable way to prove citizenship for many, although not all, things in life: it's been my experience that if you don't have a passport, you won't be able to travel outside the US. Fortunately, I learned this lesson early in my life when I missed out on a FREE trip to Africa as a new high school graduate when someone backed out of their prepaid trip at the last minute. A FREE trip to Africa?! Sign me up!! What's that? I need a passport? Oh. Umm...frick!! I immediately applied for a passport and have held it every since - just in case. I was rewarded years after receiving my first passport with a very last minute business trip to Israel that couldn't have happened without a passport in waiting and I have been rewarded many times since.

But I digress.

For those of you skeptical of your potential for opportunities for surprise last minute international travel, there are other more important reasons to consider obtaining a Certificate of Citizenship. The most critical reason to apply for a US Citizenship Certificate is that it is the only way to update the USCIS database to reflect the citizenship status of your little IR-4 former immigrant. I don't know anyone that wants to risk a tussle with the USCIS database either now or at any very inconvenient time in the future, so it's best to just get this last little business cleared up ASAP.

Bite the bullet and write the check - a whopping $460(!) (how on earth could it cost so much to get a purportedly unnecessary document when a US Passport costs "only" $100?!) and your family will sleep better at night. I know we will - assuming we actually receive the thing without any further hassles, that is.

Your X-Month-Old: Week Y

2008-09-12T04:07:00.000-07:00

Do you get these updates on your child? For me, they arrive via email and I am finding them increasingly alarming.

My how many month-old?! You must be mistaken!! When did THAT happen to MY little baby?!

Honestly, every week seems a bit too often to be reminded just how quickly my little baby is growing up. It's nearly as unnerving as facing my own annual milestone.

I admit it, there are occasional moments when I fantasize about turning the clock forward, but most often, I realize how precious each week is in a life just beginning and I wouldn't trade a minute of it for anything else in the world.

What If??

2008-09-10T16:02:00.001-07:00

I really enjoyed reading this story. I hope you do, too.

Please

2008-09-07T02:26:00.000-07:00

Island Boy's favorite word these days is, "please". He has learned that used in combination with other words it can result in good things, so we hear a lot of "More milk, please", "More cracker, please" or simply, "More, please!!"

I am under no illusions. I do not consider myself to be unusually polite, nor do I believe we are raising an unusually polite young man. No, I understand completely that in this context, "please" simply means, "I want it. NOW!"

Dirt

2008-09-04T06:24:00.000-07:00

Island Boy spent a good part of the summer staring at dirt. Ok, he often actually got right in there and became one with the dirt, but this didn't happen nearly as often as he would have liked, I'm sure.

We have just completed (or nearly completed) a major landscaping project. Although our yard had been perfectly dog-proofed, it wasn't necessarily toddler-proofed and it certainly wasn't what we'd call our home's most attractive asset. So, I spent the majority of the summer managing the project and trying to keep Island Boy entertained along the way - mostly away from home.

That's all behind us now and we finally have a new yard to enjoy. The only problem is that with our new little paradise, it feels like summer has just begun, and of course the calendar refuses to agree. Fortunately, living in Southern California affords us a bit of an endless summer, so we're hoping to ignore the calendar, crank up the patio heater as necessary and enjoy our "summer" for months to come! We've got some serious catching up to do!

New Parent Apology Cards

2008-09-04T03:23:00.000-07:00

These are pretty funny, even if they're not meant for actual use.

To the Friends and Families of Those Traveling

2008-09-01T07:54:00.001-07:00

Travel news seems to happen in batches and there have been batches and batches of families getting travel news lately (There are also lots and lots of families just entering the courts who will soon receive travel news). To all of you, congratulations!! And to all of you preparing to travel in the coming days, weeks and months, my gift to you is a few suggestions for your friends and family.

Dear friends and family of those traveling:

It's awesome that you're planning to be there for the family when they get home. Whether you're meeting them at the airport, meeting them when they arrive at home, or planning to see them in the first few days or even weeks after they return home, here are some things to consider:

First of all, it's not about you.

Yes, I'm sure you're very excited to see your new niece/nephew/grandson/granddaughter/cousin/friend, but realize you will have a lifetime to shower this new family member/friend with affection.

For now, it's all about that baby boy or girl that has just been through one of the most (probably the most) terrifying experiences of his or her life so far. Every sound that little baby hears is new. Except for the parents that little baby came home with, there are no familiar faces (and the parents have only been familiar in the last 3 or so days), no familiar smells and probably very few familiar tastes or toys. That little baby has just endured a ten-hour plus plane flight - something few adults do well. Your face is new; your smell is new and, unless you happen to speak Mandarin, your sounds are new. If you do happen to speak Mandarin, and the parents don't, feel free to speak it, but remember it's not about you. It's about the baby first and the parents second. You come somewhere after that in order of importance.

While the baby will undoubtedly be irresistible, remember that the thing he or she needs most at the moment is comfort and that comfort is best given by the people he or she knows best: the parents. What the parents need most is your help and support so that they can focus on the baby. Although the child isn't a newborn, this family is like any family welcoming a new child: things are crazy and everyone has huge adjustments to make.

What can you do to be most helpful? Bring food!! Lots and lots of food. Bring enough food for the entire family to eat when they arrive home (probably exhausted and just in time to eat and go to bed) and when they wake up the next morning and to sustain them for the next week in case they are unable to leave the house. This gesture will be appreciated far more than you know.

If you'd like to do something else that will be appreciated beyond measure, insist on taking a number of photos of the new family together. Chances are they haven't yet had a nice family photo taken of them and this is the first time they are all at home together, so take some pictures (and take lots of them, because after a long flight there is a good chance there will be a few duds in there!).

Still want to do more? Make sure the house is clean, plants are watered, cars are full of gas, clothes are washed...anything you can think of that will free the family up to spend time helping the baby adjust. Oh yes, and of course books, clothes and toys for baby are always appreciated, too.

If you're not planning to visit right away, but find yourself visiting anytime in the first few months, the same rules apply:

Bring food! Lots and lots of food! We found it so incredibly helpful (even months later) when we received meals that would last for multiple days and required no effort on our part. Offer to take pictures! Help with household chores or errands (assuming the couple is ok with that).

Here is a very special and very important thing you can do on the 3rd week after the family arrives home: Plan a 2-3 hour get-away with the new Mommy. Insist that the new Mommy accompany you to a movie or to a mall or to a spa or to a knitting group or on a hike, but insist that she get out of the house and away from the baby. Everyone will be better off for this brief time. Trust me. If the new Mommy is like me, she hasn't had any time away from baby since they met (other than during naps, but that doesn't fully count) and she really, really needs it whether she likes to admit it or not. It's also a nice time for Daddy to spend with baby. Everyone will come back refreshed and better for these few precious hours.

So there you have it - lots of ideas for how to show your love and they're all pretty easy.

Congratulations to all of you and happy, happy homecomings!