A baby-proofing expert came to our home today to strike fear into our hearts. Apparently, we are not adding a baby to our family, but rather a tiny tyrant bent on destroying everything within his reach.
The expert walked with us from room to room pointing out how our baby will insist on pulling our solid rosewood elephant from Kenya down on top of his head, tear books from the shelves and toss them at something delicate, climb aboard any piece of furniture within reach of something that he can crack his skull on, eat potting soil and leaves from our houseplants and generally locate any item we hold most dear and chew it to pieces (afterwards choking on the pieces).
Much of the expert's advice was to "put it up". Although that seems like wise advice, I'm not sure where we can put all of these things "up". Are we to build perimeter shelving around the entire house and elevate every item we own?
I am not questioning our expert's expertness. He is the guy that does all of the celebrity homes, he tells me. I am simply saying there is a line to be drawn between practical and necessary and I believe his line may be a bit extreme or at least unrealistic. Maybe celebrity homes do have entire wings in which to "put things up" but we don't so we are somehow trying to reach a happy medium to make our home both safe AND livable. The impossible dream? Stay tuned...